Wealth is aspirational. For every 1,000,000 who dream of becoming wealthy (hitting the lottery), only a tiny fraction can succeed. After all, how much room can there be at the top? The aspirants tend to overlook this statistic.
I penned “I’d Love To Be Rich” as a spoof from the viewpoint of a regular sap with daydreams of dough. Recorded in Lawrence, Ks. in 1981 or 82. The Geckettes provide the oooh wahh ooohs.
The Dancing Dairy Products at Sunflower Cablevision
The Dancing Dairy Products stepped their way into the hearts of many Eastern Kansans’ during the early 80s. They performed as part of the Barking Gecko entourage. Full disclosure: I married the cheese. (These photos by Jim Jewel.)
In performance, three dietary perspectives were presented by the Dairy MC. (No footage exists.) Here is the complete “rap” from memory:
The Meat Eater
I like to fry
Big hunks of meat
Pop ‘em in my mouth and chew
If I can’t find a sow I’ll settle for a cow
Or maybe a sheep or two
Such sweet release
I love to eat ribs till I’m blue
Love to eat ribs till I’m blue
I chew grapes
And drink pomegranate juice
I eat sprouts, lentils and mung
I’ll finish my kelp
Without any help
Wheat germ and oats keep me young
Vitamin D, so good for the knee
The heart the eyes and the lung
The soul the snout and the tongue
The Voice of Reason
But wait a minute!
Along with your meat
You just have to eat
Vegetables each day
Zucchini and steak
And bread that you bake
And don’t forget your dairy products
Don’t forget your dairy products…
Please please don’t forget your cheese
Hey that’s what I said
Smooth as silk they call it milk
a little bit of razzamatazz
After the show
The act broke up when the cheese took a teaching job. The DDP may have curdled into the sunset but this should not spoil it for true believers.
In the 70s, nothing was more anti-bohemian than the polyester leisure suit. It stood for all that was crass and square in modern, clueless, adult pop culture— disco style replacing freakwear.
Leisure suits are now considered costumes but in 1978 they were worn in a serious way. Fashion ugliness had reached a zenith. By about 1980 they had lost their luster.
In 1980, when the barking Geckos were re-forming, I put a classified ad in the Lawrence Daily Journal World asking for the donation of unwanted leisure suits, needed as a performance prop for a song of mine, Leisure Suit. Two women answered the ad. I obtained one exceedingly bright yellow number and one of a dull shade of green. Could not locate the Holy Grail color: lime green, the suit mentioned in the song. Dull, colorless green would have to do.
My son borrowed the bright yellow suit for his culturally upending dance performance with S. Hack at the South Junior High Variet Show circa 1996 or 97.
Here’s the only recorded version of the song from 1980 Barking Gecko performance at The Lawrence Opera House.